Hello to America! Greetings from Somali Board of Tourism! Much Fun Awaits!
Wednesday, June 9th, 2010
Hello to citizens of the United States of America! Much fun awaits you in the wonderful tropical paradise of Somalia. Why waste your money going to Europe? Somalia is cheap for the Americans. And prices will not cost you arm and leg. Maybe head. But we joke with the Americans. Fly to Somalia cheap. We don’t have airline but we hijack one for you. So come to our beautiful country now. See what activities await for you:
Water Sports!
We have boats! We put you on boat on sea. Enjoy the open water as we chase down bigger boat on sea. But please Americans, keep your head down! Bigger boat sometime shoot at us. Bigger boat sometimes take Somali prisoner.
High Fashion!
American come to Somali fashion show! No skinny European models at our shows. We are on the cutting edge of fashion. See one of Somalia’s favorite sons parade on catwalk with plastic explosives in underwear. Bring home to America bomb-filled underwear. A Somali tradition!
Military Discipline!
You Americans of course know of the French Foreign Legion. We in Somalia have our own foreign legion. Come join Al Qaeda in Somalia! We give you gun. You kill enemy of great Prophet. Can you do that in your Las Vegas? Can you do that in your Atlantic City? Come to Somalia. Gun training comes with food rations for those who swear allegiance to War Lord. Al Qaeda in Somalia is equal opportunity employer. We even welcome Hispanics. From New Jersey no less!
All this and more awaits for you in Somalia. We have plenty of beaches without oil spills. See the hot women on the beach! Whoooo……sexy burqa lady!
Note: Al Qaeda in Somalia is not affiliated with Burlington Coat Factory.